In this article Jennifer Berman, M.D. and founder of the Female Sexual Medicine Center at UCLA says, “You can’t be open to great sex if you’re closed off to the everyday thrills in the world around you.”
This sounds good to me so I keep reading, but then she goes on to give hint’s about how you can open yourself up to more of the everyday thrills in your life. Things like enjoying the way a cashmere sweater feels against your skin, or savoring a glass of red wine…But to be honest, I didn’t even read the rest of the article. First off, cashmere and red wine that’s worth savoring aren’t part of my daily life. Secondly, I don’t really want to listen to some M.D. tell me how to “open” myself up to more sensations. (As if I NEED to do that when I’m single. :plain: ) Thirdly, I’d rather hear what real people, real women have to say about how THEY do this.
I’d honestly have to say I think I get alot more of a thrill from writing a steamy scene than touching a cashmere sweater can ever give me. In fact, a lot of my ‘daily thrills’ come from my writing š
Okay, maybe that’s not so much funny as it is…pititful. Let’s forget that. :crazy:
How about, what do you do when you want to feel sexy? You know, we all have those days when we feel ugly no matter what we actually see when we look in the mirror. So, what do you on those days?
Me? I put on my old jeans that are baggy and make me feel skinny, a tight top that shows of my cleavage, and dark red lipstick. Not sure why, but this usually works to make me feel like I good. š
I do my hair. Nothing makes me feel better than having my hair done!
Well to tell the truth I’ve never been the kind of girl who wanted or needed to feel sexy. But lately I guess cause I’m about to turn the big 2-9 i have gone out and bought colored satin bras instead of my usual plain white. When I feel the need to feel sexy I put on the deep red underwire pushup bra and even though no one can see it I know its there and I seem to hold my head a little higher.
29! Bah! You’re a baby! š
On such rare occasions (!), I read (or write) something steamy, or watch a hot movie & imagine myself as the heroine…vicarious, but effective… š
Oh, but I don’t take what she’s saying about feeling sexy at all! It’s about exploring sensuality and using our senses to do so – and how sensuality can empower sexuality. Touch is a big one for me, same with scents. I can get a huge rush from something as simple as scratching the denim on the dh’s jeans! If we’re open to all of that in the world around us (touching the cashmere and thinking of the softness, how it reminds us of skin), it’s SO easy to experience more!!
I used to put on a special
negligee outfit-long, flowing, pink with lace.
I would sit around or do whatever it was I wanted to do like read in the evening in this outfit. Oh yes, add to that grey velvet slip-on shoes with a stocky heel.
Suzanne~ Ohh Hair. And nothing makes me feel more like a sleek purring cat than someone stroking or playing with my hair.
Paula~ I love the underwear thing. It’s almost like a naughty secret isn’t it?:P
Dream~ I agree, writign always makes me feel sexy. š
Alison~ I understand what she was saying, and I do agree,we need to stop and pay attention to theings in our dailylife that helps us use all of our senses. Therfore, helps us get intouch wiht out sensuality. But after saying I get most of my own thrills through my writing…I was trying to be funny and changed the subject from ways to find thrills and enhance our senses, to what made you feel sexy on a bad day. :hehe:
Robyn~ That’s a great way to treat yourself! To make yourself feel sexy and womanly!
I don’t have time to feel sexy. It just doesn’t fit in my schedule. Okay I’m kidding but honestly, I’m answerless. I don’t wear cashmere and I don’t drink red wine. I guess I’ll opt for getting my hair done–it’s not quite sexy but it does make me feel good. So does a pedicure.
Before surgery, I never thought I could be sexy. Hell I still don’t. Now I can say I am pretty. Well prettier then before. I think having my hair done, my make up and wearing jeans with a black shirt. I just feel pretty. Can’t say cleavage those were the first to go after GBS.
I put on a long skirt. š I’m a fairly ordinary, nondescript person most of the time, but I’ve always had a thing for flouncy, overlong, yards of material skirts. Even the green patchwork one with the holes in it (mental note – must darn ;))
There’s something about they way they make me walk, about the way they swirl around my legs, becoming an extension of my whole body’s movement.
Wonderful.
Chiming in late here to say…. I put on a silk shirt (not into cashmere) and drink red wine. š I know, I know, but when I’m stalled on a sex scene, I find a little red wine does WONDERS. And Prince. Prince helps alot. Or beck. Any Short, Sexy, Singer. š