LUST;
1) An intense or unrestrained sexual craving.
2) An overwhelming desire or craving: a lust for power.
Intense eagerness or enthusiasm: a lust for life.
Obsolete. Pleasure; relish.
I love lust.
I love that feeling I get when I meet someone new, and the chemistry is crackling and lust simmers in my viens. The thrill of learning more. Learning what turns him on, what turns me on. Just how good we can be together. But, there’s more to lust than sexual cravings.
I also love the thrill of living. I have a healthy lust for new and adventurous things. At least I always have. Recently I’ve had a few people tell me they love my lust for life, and it’s sort of made me sit back and go, “Wow, they’re seeing something I don’t really feel anymore.” Because I don’t really feel that lust anymore. And I can’t pin point when I stopped feeling it.
But I do know I’m going looking for it again.
Life is short, and it’s meant to be lived.
One of the things I’m doing today is creating a new list of things I want to experience before I die. I did this about 15 years before – and told you all about it HERE – and my list has 30 things on it. Out of those 30 things, I’ve accomplished more than half, and realized that I really have no interest in a quarter of them.
So they’re scratched. Now …to write the new list.
You’d think it would be easy. I thought it would be easy. Unfortunately, it seems my drive, and my lust for living seems to have dissapated. I want to feel that way again, but sometimes wanting it isn’t enough.
I’m having a hard time sticking to my health plan, a hard time makeing myself write. The only thing I really want to do is sleep and watch TV. What’s with me?
Okay, I want to read too. But..that’s about it.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. I know this feeling. It comes when I need to get away from life. Normally I’d quit my job, pack my backpack and empty my bank account. Unfortunatlye with making writing my main focus for the last year and a half, my banl account IS empty, and I can’t quit my job. I could take my laptop with me and do my job (writing) while I travel … but first, I need to fattent he bank account. So, it’s back to the bar for me. I’ve arrangd to work some lunch shifts in the restaurant and it feels good. Maybe I just need to get out of the house more???
I pretty sure it’s a phase. I hope it’s a phase…but how do I drag myself out of it without actually leaving the country? How do you give yourself a kick in the ass when you know you need it? Any suggestions??
Sasha, I know just how you feel and I’m sure getting out of the house will help. I’ve been trying to do more of it myself, but I’m limited because of my disability anyway and being a writer just compounds that problem. It just takes more effort, sometimes difficult to muster. Enjoy your shifts. As soon as youre away from your laptop you’ll start brimming with ideas too, I bet. 😉
:fight: I know how you feel! I spend more hours with my TiVo lately than I do my laptop. I swore I was going to quit smoking after Atlanta and did so for 2 weeks – not one cigarette. THen, I sabotaged myself and started again. I swore I was going to get healthy – not skinny. I’ve worked out a total of 3 days since Atlanta and have no desire to move my fanny.
2 years ago, I did everything with gusto. Now I’m lucky if I do anything at all:crying:
WHEN i see myself feeling lazy or sluggish i look at my younger sister and how her life is doing or where is going(nowere) and i snapp out of it n kick my self in the ass n put some fire to it cause i tell my self i am not going to b like her, im older too, stuck with a man that dont respect me n stuck with a child that i cant move no were with out them, no sorry thats not me, i get up i start doing my exercises n go for a jog or a bike ride with my goddaughter on the back seat n we go to the park. i just keep active n just keep that fire on my ass at all time. n go straight to work afterwards n count my blessings that i don’t have a lazy life or a lazy man in my life. so she actualy motivates me to keep moving n living. :great:
the things on my list are small. my main three are. lose all the weight i have, learn to swim,and have my own business. there my three main goals in life. ive travel to the carrabeans,i know three languages, i know how to play an instrument. so my list is short. oh yeah one more tihng. to beat all my phobias i have on my back.:unsure:
I always go get my hair done at my favorite salon, dress up and go out for a night…
I felt like that when I returned for Atlanta, Sasha…that trip did wonders for me, and I was like I’m going to maintain that high, that lasted about three weeks, then I was back to the grind, stressing about my deadline, living in my PJs, drinking Pepsi again…
I want that high back too!
The only thing I really want to do is sleep and watch TV. What’s with me?
Oh thank God–it isn’t just me!! :light:
If you figure it out, hon, let me know.
Well, I thinkI’ll spend the weekend readeing, sleeping and watchign tv..then on Monday..Get my ass back in gear with a steady schedule. I honestly thinkjust gettingout of the house willbe a big help. BUt I’ll keep reporting in!
Thanks everyone!:great:
I would think making that list would be extremely difficult. As for the mood you’re going through, I do think it has to do with staying in the house. I’m experiencing the same thing. Seriously. It blows, especially since it’s currently winning. :ko:
Definitely get out of the house more! I used to do all my errands during the week after work, then pretty much vegg at home all weekend. Told myself I *needed* the do-nothing time to destress.
But for the last month or so I’ve been running around of the weekends. Partly errands, partly pleasure. My weekends actually seem far more relaxing now and (surprisingly) longer than when I hung around the apartment. Before it’d be Sunday night before I knew it, now by Saturday afternoon, I’ll look at the clock and think, “Geez, is it only ?? oclock? I’ve gotten so much done already!”
Hey Sasha,
I don’t write, but I think that I experience something similar when I focus too intently on something. If I have the chance to do something new I’m really happy before the thing and during, but afterward there’s always a let down.:shock:
I’m pretty sure that wouldn’t happen if I have more thing to focus on at a time. I also get depressed when I spend too much time thinking about my own life, problems, dissapointments etc. if you have the time you could volunteer to feed the homeless or something. I think if you or I can see people who are currently struggling to survive then it helps me to see that maybe my life doesn’t suck so much after all.:grin:
I get in the car and just drive. Doesn’t matter to where or what the weather is doing or who I’m with – if anyone. I just drive. Open road driving with the windows down and the music blaring is a blast. I did it just last weekend, went for a drive down the surf coast. Lucky for me, the weather played nice. I had the camera and indulged in the digital photography kick I have. (Honestly, more pics than I know what to do with, hehe) But my motto for the day was Get Out and Be and Do. (maybe it just shoulda been get off your ass, Laura! hehe)
Maybe you’re suffering from a little burnout. Give yourself permission to take time out and do whatever makes you happy. Take a short trip, indulge in hobbies you’ve neglected of late, take some pics of guys 😈 – whatever works. You’ve had a hugely successful year, you’ve worked hard and you’ve pushed yourself. Enjoy that. Use that to drive you onwards!
I was, and am, suffering from that, most of last year i just laid around the house watched tv and read many many novels. My zest for life is gone, and i hated it, so when my parents told me that they were moving to Alberta for a year, in Edmonton, because my father finally got a job here, I decided to join along for the sake of my sister who still hasn’t accepted the move.
Shoot I accidentally pressed submit, but anyways, I told myself, and everyone else that I was doing this for the sake of my sister, who doesn’t take change well, but I also did it to try to get my zest back. To find myself, the self i know i lost somewhere along the way of 2 years of university, and to get a full time job to pay back more then 20, 000 worth of student fees. Right now I’m trying to focus in learning my new job and getting comfortable with it, and trying to survive 3 am to noon shifts where I’m on my feet for all of it, except maybe half hour. After that, I seriously want to get out there, learn more about this town, go out meet new people, get friends that are my type of people so I don’t go insane living with my parents for another year, which in my last year of highschool I had promised myself I would never ever come back, for reasons that are now becoming painfully clear, then I realized something. I am no longer in the rut I was in, I sing and dance at work because I’m enjoying myself (and to keep myself sane through 9 hours of excrutiating bone tiring work), and I have the energy to go out again. Something I will need some guidance in doing since I have no idea where to go in Edmonton to meet people I want to meet, and soon I might start going to horseback riding lesson, one of the things in my list I finally see as possible (unlike that of going to the moon before I die). I think the best thing to do is to try new things, even if you don’t want to, it will motivate you to try other things nad ot grab life by the throat again.